Lundeen says, “Nyet.”
Perhaps you’ve experienced something similar, “I won both of my matches in the past two weeks and my ranking went DOWN! What gives?”
Secret Russian hackers manipulating the rankings to depress your scores for someone far inferior to your paddle abilities?
A different kind of hack.
Perhaps… and perhaps not. It has come to our attention that some Men’s League members have been been recording three set scores when they had lost both sets.
“C’mon fellas,” denounced President Borowiak, “it’s just not that hard. Your weekly match is first team to two sets. If it takes three sets to win — fine — but if you lose in two, the score you record on the laptop is just the two sets.”
This is not the first time that the veracity of Mr.Lundeen’s creation has been challenged. The Lundeen 2000 (an earlier version) was hacked in 2014 by notorious TCC Emeritus Member, Chris Crosse, when he made an all out push to secure substitute matches with lower ranked players, thereby accumulating massive amounts of points. Crosse moved from the 15 spot all the way to no.7 under much protest. When his scheme was uncovered, Crosse high-tailed it out of town to Portland, Oregon, instead of facing his shame.
Today’s Lundeen 3000 discourages this approach, since high ranked players who play with low ranking players must win by a dominant score to secure any positive points at all. A 2-set win by a smaller margin is likelier to lose points for the high ranked paddler.
Bottom line?
Record your scores consistently and accurately. And, if you’re looking to “game” the system, offer to sub for a member in need and just keep winning your league matches!
This is a great reminder. DO NOT record a third set if you won the match in the first two.
Another main theme, RECORD YOUR DAMN MATCH. It is amazing how many matches are played without anybody entering the result. Regardless of if you win or lose, walk off the court and head right to the computer and enter it yourself. Each person should check the computer to make sure that the real results are entered correctly.
If you’re winning and not moving up, chances are, nobody entered it.
Duke is spot on – I grabbed scores from last week and about half were NOT entered. Now, did Crosse sneak into our treasured shrine and delete them? Perhaps, but there will be no recount. What is done is done. Nothing to see here….moving on.
The allegations of my incorrect reporting are, of course, false. I never input any match results in the original Lundeen 3000 nor any subsequent version as I did not care what my rank was. I played paddle for the right reasons, those being fellowship, celebration of the sport, and the opportunity to pound an occasional drive at Squirrel’s head. The Lundeen 3000 is for real. Always has been, always will be.
Snoop, your rise to the top back then, was meteoric — in fact, unprecedented. I’m sure it was because of your big serve.
As a former member/owner of the Cedar Club, I’m well versed in the desperate attempts by some to assuage their fragile ego’s by manipulating match results. Back in my day we called it “pulling a Lynch” but I digress. I offer a simple solution to serve as an indication of whether or not results have been manipulated. If Martone or Squirrel are ranked in the top 10, I would suspect foul play. If they are simultaneously ranked in top 10, clearly the system has been compromised. I can think of three technical advances that have moved us forward the most as a species. They are the particle accelerator at CERN, the self driving car, and of course, the Lundeen 3000.
The Ladder Master Algorithm
1) Buy Curt’s favorite bourbon
2) Stash in rafters above the good beer fridge
3) Take selfie of said donation (style points given creativity)
4) Email selfie to the man behind the curtain
4.a) Deny any knowledge of donation if asked